Giving is one of the greatest aspects of life. Our humanitarian side provides value to our own beings and those that surround us. Yet, this is not a perfect construct.
Givers can give so much that it is to their own detriment. If you pour out all you have to the point that there is nothing left to sustain your own wellbeing, then what? There is a healthier way to share with others and refuel yourself by paying attention to the levels of your own wellbeing in four specific areas:
Think about these areas as critical glasses of self. When you become depleted in any one of them you feel off-balanced and sometimes hollowed out. What actions you take today determine your state tomorrow.
- By taking note of how full your glass is in each quadrant, you quickly learn which is highest. Then you can determine the most effective way for you to give in a pure, unattached way.
- At the same time, knowing your lowest area tells you where you need to give back to yourself. Proactively focusing some of your day’s activities on refilling that quadrant creating a better tomorrow.
Here is a story to help illustrate this wellbeing philosophy. Let’s say you have a friend who needs help moving. They graciously moved you a couple years ago, so your want to say “yes” is strong. The problem is your back has been bothering you. Sometimes it has the tendency to go out. Basically, your physical quadrant is suffering.
What do you do?
When you are tuned into your wellbeing, you’d also know that your mental area is high. You had a very productive day at work yesterday and you are feeling sharp as a tack.
What do you do?
If you do decide to move your friend, caring heavy objects down flights of stairs, you risk harming yourself further. Consider how this would make your friend feel if they knew.
What do you do?
Instead, you could be transparent and tell your friend your bad back is not playing very nice, but that you are very happy to be of assistance from a brain power standpoint. You know you can be the best box-labler ever seen.
This is not saying don’t give. Never stop being the giver you are. Just do it in a way that sustains you to give again another day. Give wisely.
A giving tree of information:
10 Signs You Are Giving to Much, Huffington Post
The Poor Give More, Greater Good Berkley University
Being to Generous Could Hurt your Relationships, Lifehacker
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